Continuing to enjoy my social media sabbatical. Day eleven. Today’s a dreary day in North Alabama. Rainy and cool as I’m sitting at ballet class. Not MY ballet class mind you. I can barely walk and talk at the same time. I am definitely not coordinated enough to dance.
While I’m waiting on my two biggest girls, I’m devouring “You are the Girl for the Job” by Jess Connolly.
The book was a gift from a dear friend and it was just what I needed in this season. I’ve made sure to have my pen handy and underlined way more of this book than is normal or recommended.
In my reading today she touches on COMMUNITY. I think she might have even read my mind possibly before she wrote this particular chapter.
She mentions that she finds women fall into basically two groups:
“A. Some women feel left out of the tribe mentality altogether, like they missed that lesson in elementary school. I had one friend cry to me a few years ago because no one ever taught her how to use foundation or host a great slumber party. I remember telling her: Me either. I don’t think those lessons ever took place.
B. I’ve found that there is a host of women who do have a crew of tight-knit friends, but they still feel alone, and maybe even anxious that their tribe keeps them from thriving and living their most abundant life.”
I feel like I’m a mix of both. I’ve never felt as though I found my TRIBE. Do I have friends? Absolutely. And some pretty amazing ones. But their numbers are few. I would venture to say that only a handful of women know me at my core. Like truly KNOW me.
I bet many THINK they know me, but they don’t.
As an extrovert, I feel like I quickly make friends, but maybe they’d qualify more as acquaintances.
There are more times I’ve felt the sting of loneliness more than the warmth of friendship.
The circle that I keep closest knows all my stories. Good and bad.
But I hold that close. I don’t let just anyone into that circle. What if they knew the REAL me? Would they still like me? Would they want to be my friend? Would they stand in judgement?
I’m good at letting others in just “enough” while keep them at a safe distance at the same time.
A defense mechanism I think. It plays into the feeling that, at the end of the day, I can truly only count on myself.
My thoughts are whirling but I want to continue reading….I’ll be back soon.
What about you?
Have you found your tribe?
Do you feel like others really know you?
Do you still feel alone even when surrounded by friends?
Scroll back up and leave me a comment…I’d love to chat.